What a Difference a Year Makes - Thoughts on Resilience
I came across a quote from one of my favorite books “Maybe You Should Talk to Someone” written by Lori Gottlieb. The quote simply says, “A lot can happen in the space of a step.” What I love about this quote is the fact that a step is all a matter of perspective. When we think of a step we think of something small. But a step isn’t necessarily something small. A step can be a minute, hour, day, week, month, you get the idea. A step can be a difficult conversation, standing up for yourself, a choice on what you do with your time and so many other things. The problem comes in the fact that we don’t usually focus on the steps, we focus on the whole journey and it becomes overwhelming. We see the whole journey and make that the goal. It’s the steps, however, that get us there.
A little over a year ago, I went through a major surgery. Both life-threatening and life-saving. One of those situations where it’s dangerous to take action, but just as dangerous to not take action. When I think of the idea of a lot happening in the space of a step, this whole situation screams at me. Just over a year ago I woke up from an 18 hour surgery, I took inventory of all my faculties – arms still moving, legs still moving, etc. My first question after talking with my loved ones was “When can I get out of bed?” I was disappointed to hear I’d have to spend the next 3 days on my back out of safety due to the length of the surgery. 3 days of just moving my bed up and down. Nothing more. So at that point, especially by the end of the 3rd day – the only thing I was looking forward to was that 1st step, but it felt like there was a lot keeping me from that first step.
After that first step was accomplished, it did me no good to stay there. We took another step, walking down the hall and back. And then another step, walking around the hospital unit. It would have been very easy to get down on myself and say – I’m not doing anything, I’m only walking down the hall or I’m only walking around the unit, but we all know that’s not true. These small feats were big strides after the surgery I’ve been through. Each next step got me further and further in my journey of recovery.
Looking back at that whole ordeal I see how many steps it took just to get me to that first step. And I look and see all the steps that took me to where I am now. Steps may seem like they’re small feats but when put together they make for an amazing journey. The best part about a journey is the getting there. The destination is fun and it’s always your target, but the getting there is where the stories come up, the history is made and memories are forged. So I urge you, don’t get lost in the destination, when the steps and the journey are really the thing you look back on when it’s all said and done.
We don’t discount a child when they take their first steps, but it’s so much easier at times to discount ourselves when we do the same in life. We encourage children to take another step and another and before we know it, they don’t need encouragement, they’re just doing it because it’s become natural. It’s just what they do. Steps are a path to resilience. We don’t get where we’re hoping to go unless we keep taking steps and keep going.
The steps are what get us to the goal, but the steps are also what we look back on and talk about once we reach our goal.